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Conrad A. Panganiban

Conrad A. Panganiban

playwright | conradap@gmail.com

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A Poem for Lola

Posted on 03/06/2007 by Conrad

I’m off to the library to work on my play again, but before i go, I wanted to put this up. I never knew both of my Grandmothers but I felt compelled to write this based on the events of last week. This is a shorter version because I didn’t weigh down LISA’s dialogue and rhythm within the scene. Also, I’m not a poet. I actually gave up writing poetry since one of my poems got rejected by Maganda Magazine. All wasn’t a loss since one of my artworks got published.

Dedicated to my lolas, to LeRoid and xLe’s grandma who recently passed (I pulled some of these lines from the eulogies heard), to my Smokey Joe Sister’s Granny whom i never met, but I know how much of an impact she made on her, to Francisca Balderama, the closest lola that I’ve ever had without the blood relation, thank you. And all the lola’s who’ve made a difference to their grandchildren.

R.J.
You can’t just jump in and say that there’s something wrong with what I wrote and not give tell me how I can fix it.

LISA
I guess that wouldn’t be right, would it? Alright… let me get this straight, Jasen’s grandmother is on her death bed, right?

R.J.
Right… his Lola, just in case you didn’t…

LISA
Riiight. And he’s trying to tell her how much she means to him?

R.J.
Right. Also, can you add in the dancing stuff since he’s in the Modern Dance segment and he really wanted that in his monologue?

LISA
You’re not making it easy on me, are you?

R.J.
Nope.

LISA
Okay…

Lola, I know that you can hear my voice between the ever growing silence between each inhale… and exhale you take.
Please listen to my words of praise and thank yous for everything that you have given me.
From the time I first heard the stories of how you hid in the hills with your children in tow
As strangers invaded our land of golden sunsets and fragrant sampaguitas… again
Protector of my mother and uncle when you moved to a new land of velvet fogged-in mornings and cable cars that went up and down California Street
To the one who helped raise me and my brother
to know wrong from wrong and
right from right
to left to right to left
and back again
the dance steps you taught me from the Jitterbug to La Jota to the Tinikling
of bamboo polls that still resonate from my ears to my core
click click clap
click click CLAP!
I snap out of my trance Lola, when I hear your voice call out to me, “Did you eat yet?”
And before I could even get out the words, “I’m fine, Grandma.”
A plate of Rice and Diniguan is placed before me
Which is made with the recipe, of not chocolate meat, which we Should Not try to pass off as a euphemism to ignorant Western palettes
But made with the special ingredient that only YOU can provide – Your Love
Because of you
I know what love is
Because of you
I know what strength is
Because of you, Grandma
I know the importance of taking the time to take in the essence of a rose with a single breath
To take in the essence of life and how to live it
With each Step
I Take
In Dance
In YOUR HONOR
Dahil Sa Iyo, Lola
Alam ko na kung sino ako
Salamat po at
Mahal kita

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Headshot of Conrad A. Panganiban

Conrad A. Panganiban (he/him/his) is an award-winning Filipino American playwright representing the San Francisco Bay Area. His plays include Daryo’s All-American Diner, Welga, and River’s Message. Conrad’s work has been produced by Bindlestiff Studio, The Chikahan Company, CIRCA Pintig (IL), the MaArte Theatre Collective, and CATS (Contemporary Asian Theatre Scene) . Awards include: Best Play of 2023, Daryo’s All-American Diner (BroadwayWorldAwards Chicago), Best New Play, Daryo’s All-American Diner (Chicago Reader, Best of 2023), Susan Fairbrook Playwright Fund Awardee (TheatreWorks Silicon Valley), 2023 New Voices in Comedy Writing Fellowship (Killing My Lobster), James Milton Highsmith Award Winner (SFSU), National Ten-Minute Play Festival Finalist (Actors Theatre of Louisville), and Bay Area Playwrights Festival Semi-Finalist (Playwrights Foundation). Resident Artist: Bindlestiff Studio. Member: Dramatist Guild of America, and Theatre Bay Area. MFA, San Francisco State University. @consplayspace

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